Well, here it is mid-December, a time year when a New England girl likes to look out of her window to gaze upon the beauty of snow falling gently from the sky.
When that snow defies the rules and falls out of the sky as rain, it casts a gloomy fog upon the residents of Shiny Red Houses and makes them very, very cross.
Why Rain in December is Bad:
1. Must take out dogs in the rain. Dogs do not like being out in the rain. Bad dog chooses to wait until she is inside and poop on the floor. Bad dog!
2. The rain causes each family members most annoying traits to be amplified. This creates the need to find ever more creative places to hide from them.
3. Most effective hiding place is the basement which is dark and gross. It is however, the hiding place for all of the leftover Halloween candy.
4. While hiding from hideously annoying family members in the basement it seems like a Very Good idea to sample leftover Halloween candy.
5. Must then both hide in the basement and attempt to do difficult math to calculate the caloric damage of eating twelve mini butterfingers.
6. Find yourself eating m&m's while realizing that caloric math is hard.
7. Go upstairs and decide to give Lily an impromptu hair cut. Regret this decision almost immediately. Assure her that it looks "spunky".
8. Eat more butterfingers.
9. Attempt to make some Christmas ornaments to give as gifts. Upon viewing the ornaments, pray that friends and family are kindhearted or at the very least possessed of poor eye sight.
10. Take soothing bath with youngest child. Have youngest child ask, "Mommy, are your boobs going to keep getting droopier? I am a curious child and want to know."
11. Get out of tub and check weather report. More rain.
12. Huddle under pugs and wait for snow.