Wednesday, January 19, 2011

In which I swoon...

I have been hoarding my February issue of Martha Stewart Living, saving it for a quiet moment when I could savor each page of home perfection.

Tonight that moment of quiet occurred in the bathtub. I ran the water super hot, got in and cracked open the magazine. I had made it a few pages when I audibly swooned.

It was a linen closet, a truly magnificent linen closet.

1. I do not own a linen closet. I barely have any clothes closets, never mind an actual closet with shelves devoted for linens.

2. I cannot fold sheets. I am sheet folding illiterate. I wash the sheets and then kind of crumple them up and shove them into a box under my bed.

3. My kids sheets aren't even on the same floor as their beds.

My house is a linen closet failure. There are no neatly folded stacks of lavender scented, color coordinated sheets sitting upon clearly labeled shelves. I am coming to realize that I may die before I achieve this goal.

In other news, I finally realized why my house has smelled weird all day.

Good news: It was not a dead bird.

Bad news: Lily had taken some rinsed, but by no means washed tuna fish cans out of the recycling and had a game of three card monte going on in her room.

So, that's my day. Squalor, tuna smell and gambling. You?


Cheryl said...

Martha doesn't live in a home built in New England back when folks didn't have enough money for extra sheets and clothing. You're practically living a pioneer life. Isn't that one of your dreams?

Julie said...

Then I shant tell you about the Mary Janes Farm magazine I got with the lady who remodelled the hunting cabin into a little one woman retreat with everything painted white and a chandelier.

Anonymous said...

Let it out Julie.

Left-Handed Housewife said...

I have a linen closet. It is pristine for perhaps 48 hours a year. The rest of the time it's a tangled, disheveled mess. My linen closet is why I rarely can bring myself to buy Living anymore. I just can't stand to be faced with my own inadequacies twelve times a year.


Gumbo Lily said...

I just wash the sheets once a week and put them back on their beds. Not really any extras except maybe a spare flat sheet here or there in a closet. Who needs linen closets? Martha Stewart!


Pom Pom said...

How funny! And resourceful! (tuna cans)
I wish you a linen closet full of Gap style folded beauty, but you're pretty darn good at this sort of thing, I think. I look closely at your pictures and see all kinds of gifted arranging and THAT I swoon for.

Jayne said...

A linen closet is something I've always wanted, with pristine linens. He he, it will never happen, I'm not organised enough. But I do have a lovely old, deep chest of drawers that I am going to paint white for that very purpose.