Thursday, May 6, 2010

Dead bird detention...

Before I begin this post I need to give you a dead bird update.

It's still in the vent. It still stinks. Not only did David leave town without removing it, he went to his dance class instead. Tomorrow when he gets home he going to directly from the train to, yes, you guessed it, his dance class.

I could not make this stuff up.

I may have to do it myself tomorrow, though I'm still not over the last time I removed a dead bird.

I have some more bird news for you- though happily these birds are not dead, well, not yet anyway. Nature can be a cruel mistress, as I know all too well.

Last week David announced that a family of wrens had built a nest in our shed, right behind the bottle of RoundUp. He found four little eggs and one uneasy mama who watched his every move while he took out the lawn mower. By yesterday they had hatched! Today I took my camera in for a peek.


When I first walked in the babies were camouflaged in the shadows. Then I said, "Tweet! Tweet!" and they poked their little heads up hoping for lunch.

Birds are so sweet when they are not dead and rotting in my exhaust vent.

Anyway, we can move past the birds. Well, you can. I am stuck in dead bird detention.

I was going to blog about homeschooling and our new homeschooling project, but this bird situation has me too dejected. The smell, have I mentioned the smell? The dogs keep staring up at the vent. They know that there is something in there which they would love to either roll in or eat. Hell, who am I kidding- they'd roll in it and then eat it.

So here I am, a homeschooling mom who spends her days trying to educate her babies, train her dogs, write television pitch books and rid the house of animal hair. As if that is not pathetic enough, I now find myself laying awake at night worried about the inevitable moment of folly when I dare to hold my breath and pee in the downstairs bathroom only to discover too late that the maggots have made their way through the vent and are landing on my head.


Please send Brad Pitt, chocolate and a babysitter. Mama's gone a bit crazy.

15 comments:

Lisa said...

Gross!
Sorry about the smell!
Hope you can live with it a while longer!
Hugs, Lisa
ps get chocolate

Christine said...

I wonder if the smell of dead bird is like the smell of dead mouse?

Cheryl said...

This is a beautifully written post. One of your finest, in fact. Once again, I am overwhelmed by the depth of your abilities as a writer.

Who knew one could make the idea of dead bird(s) stuck somewhere overhead so poetic? I so loved how you juxtaposed the dead with the living (how awesome that you speak wren). And the maggots. The coup de grace.

Unknown said...

I choose this moment to read your blog while eating and early lunch...love the maggots!
This sound like my house except it's usually dead mice that my husband has intensionally poisened and refuses to remove..UGH
Happy Mother's Day!

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