Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Dear Miss Twinkle Toes,

When I was in seventh grade I had a friend named Chrissy. Chrissy was funny, quirky and obsessed with horses.

Chrissy also had an alter ego named Miss Twinkle Toes who had an advice column. She was kind enough to revive Miss Twinkle Toes for this blog.

Dear Miss Twinkle Toes,

Every day when I get home from work I find that my cat has been eating my Doritos and recording over my Law and Order episodes on Tivo. Whenever I confront him he ignores me and licks his butt.

What should I do?

Signed,

Disrespected by my cat


Dear Disrespected,

I have to admit that the mention of Doritos distracted me for a few minutes. But let me get to the heart of the matter.

Cats are very, very intelligent creatures. Obviously, he's planning your murder. What seems like butt licking is really him trying to distract you from the very shows from which his murderous plans have sprung. I'm sure he's off hocking your jewelry right at this moment...saving up for a fine getaway vehicle.

Don't believe me? Invest in a hidden camera...otherwise, the proof is in the orange kitty tracks!!

Rattled,
Ms. Twinkle Toes

Please send any questions for Miss Twinkle Toes to sara@limulusproductions.com

5 comments:

Unknown said...

OMG...I so forgot about these! I've had a week of reminicing. Last night I went out with Matt D'Elia and we saw Dave Haywood play locally. A few other Neumanites were there...Rich Tear, Eddie and Chrissy Scafedi, Diana Pandolfo...good time!
I pulled out my OLQOP class pictures from our Pocono trip and Father Tim pictures...I will post them soon!

Ms. Twinkle Toes said...

Thanks for the shout -out, Sara and Sullygirl2001... :)

Jean said...

Aren't memories grand? Have a great day.
jean in Virginia

Lisa said...

Oh wow!! I'll have to come up with a question!!
Hugs, Lisa

mgster said...

HAHAHA! LOVE IT! I'll be looking at our two kitties in a different way now...after all, they have been known to lick their butts, especially in front of company. Or when we are eating.