I first noticed the smell yesterday.
I didn't mention it to you guys because I was hoping it would go away on its own.
The smell was in the downstairs bathroom, the roof of the very bathroom which recently had an air conditioner dropped on it. In addition to being a landing strip for wayward air conditioners, this roof also has an exhaust vent which has become the home to a family of birds.
The birds have been nesting there every year and each year we think, "We should do something about that", but then inertia and our somewhat hippy tendencies would get the better of us and before you know it we hear the sweet chirping of baby birdies. Ah, nature! So pure and beautiful, we love its dulcet strains.
So when I smelled the bad smell, the dare I say rotting smell, I had a very bad feeling about what had happened in the exhaust vent.
First, I removed the light fixture. Nothing there...but the smell was worse.
I went upstairs for a while to pretend I did not have a dead bird somewhere in my bathroom.
It was not effective.
Back down I went, with my favorite phillips head screwdriver in hand and carefully removed the housing from the vent.
And there it was. A dead rotting bird jammed between the wall and the vent.
I immediately called David.
"You have to come home right now." I tried to speak calmly.
"What's the matter? Are you okay?" He asked.
"There's a dead bird in the bathroom and you need to come home and get it out!" I said.
"Well, I would come home, but I'm 3000 miles away, so I think you're on your own with this one" he said.
"You don't understand. You. Have. To. Come. Home. Now." I stated.
Readers, that man laughed at me! So while he is in Los Angeles, CA enjoying fancy lunches and promoting his new business, I had to remove the dead bird from the vent.
I used a dog poop bag and pulled it out. I was terrified that there would be maggots. Maggots would have sent me straight to Mclean's.
There were no maggots, though there were lots of stinky feathers which I cleaned up.
Once that was over I washed my hands about 100 times and contemplated just burning the house down in order to erase the memory from my mind.
Instead, I made a cup of coffee and went to Global Thrift because that's what big girls do when faced with dead rotting birds.
Global Thrift is a gritty Good Will type store in Waltham, MA. All I can say is that the junk store gods must have seen me suffering with that bird carcass because the haul from the thrift store was epic.
Check it out!
I've been looking for an old Radio Flyer wagon for years! I want to put flowers in it, though mark my words, Lily will take possession of that in seconds once she gets home. The wagon was 5.99!
I actually gasped out loud when I saw the old turquoise Coleman cooler. I love old coolers and the color! I just adore it! Also 5.99.
What is that shiny black thing? I have no idea, but I plan to put umbrella's in it...or maybe sunflowers.
Chippy red striped lamp 3.99, Scotch Jug Thermos 3.99 and jadite mug .99!
I can't wait to play with this house!
It's a facade and I'm going to redecorate it.
It would be more authentic with a dead bird jammed somewhere...
Speaking of the dead bird...
Let's just have a moment of silence and a collective cursing out of David for forcing me to deal with this on my own.
I will be eating chocolate now.